Week #41 (Oct.8-14, 2018)

I Can't Stop Myself! 🙈

 

Week #41 (Oct. 8-14, 2018) - The Battle for Discipline & Self-Control

(Today’s a long one, but totally worth it, so stick with me)I have ALWAYS struggled with going to bed at a reasonable time. For as long as I can remember, I have fancied myself more a night owl than a morning person. This habit was further reinforced in my university years, that necessitated long hours of studying into the night. Add to this, the nature of traveling, touring and performing (most concerts are at night), and you can easily understand how the last decade has hardwired me to be nocturnal.

This wouldn’t be much of a problem, if it didn't impact other aspects of my life. Whereas before as an unattached, green-behind-the-ears artist, it wasn't a big deal. Now however, as a husband, father, and business owner, when I sleep has great ramifications.So I've been earnestly trying to discipline myself to sleep earlier these last few months. But it has not been easy. I have failed on many nights to exhibit the self-control needed to get a good night's sleep. As a result I’ve been thinking a lot about the nature of discipline and self-control.I’ve found that at least for me, the nature of self-control and discipline are all encompassing. It’s really hard (if not impossible) to exhibit self-control in one area of life, when other areas aren’t being attended to.  And I believe the main reason for this is because, all aspects of our lives are connected.

For example, when I’m not being diligent in going sleep at an appropriate time, I either sleep too late into the morning thus losing precious time to complete very important tasks the following day, or if I do by some miracle still wake up early, then I’m more tired and sluggish the entire day. Tasks take me double the time. In either scenario, my productivity and/or alertness is affected.To make up for lost time, I might still complete my tasks, but without the level of detail I would typically give. More commonly though, I have to cut out certain things. This might mean, axing my workout or worse yet (if I can be TOTALLY honest), my time of reading the Bible or praying 🙈. Naturally, this can have other more severe consequences than simply not crossing off some “To Dos.”  My spiritual alertness and willingness/ability to fight off sin are compromised. On the really bad days when my heart feels far from God, my mood takes a hit, and in turn, so do my interactions (or lack thereof) with my wife and son. ALL OF THIS FROM NOT SLEEPING ON TIME!!!Worse yet, if I want to catch up on work, -it's also hard to sleep in a bad mood- I end up staying up way too late again, and the cycle repeats. Ok, what if I’m getting the sleep thing right, but not really monitoring my diet. Well, the more unhealthy I eat, the more tired I feel during the day, making me less likely to workout. In turn, I I feel even more tired, which then affects my productivity and the cycle repeats itself.Here’s a BONUS: even my finances are affected when I’m not being disciplined in other areas of life. So if I’m perpetually tired during the day (or strapped for time), I’m more likely to buy snacks/food to keep me going. That $5 breakfast each day (or $10-$15 lunch) adds up very quickly. You see the point?The point is, EVERYTHING is connected. So I'm learning that if I want to be successful in regulating my sleep time, I would do well to also monitor other areas of my life (ie. diet, exercise, social media consumption, entertainment, etc.). To ask myself; what other areas of my life, am I slacking in?! Also, seeing how sleep (or lack thereof) affects other areas of my life is acting as a great motivation for me to get it right.Here's one more thing I'm learning about self-control & discipline. The more I give in to my impulses (good or bad), the less I am able to deny myself in general. Conversely, the more I learn to deny myself some things (even good things), the more able I am to decline dangerous things. I have seen this repeatedly bear witness in my life. I know I am far more able to resist sin (or an extra piece of desert), when I have been conditioning myself by choosing to stop aimlessly scrolling through social media, or choosing to exercise when I don’t feel like it.

Remember it’s easier to increase the height of a wall, than to start building one from scratch.

I realize this has already gone really long, but I can hear someone screaming "I guess I'm screwed. I don't sleep, eat, spend, or basically do anything well. I have no discipline. How do I even start?"I am no expert, but let me offer you some suggestions;i.) Just start: there is no perfect time.ii.) Start small: focus on one area. Don't try to conquer sleep, diet, exercise, finance, all at once. Focus on one, and you'll begin to see impacts in others. I suggest starting with sleep and time with God, since those set the tone for each day.iii.) Be firm & fair: if you fail (which you probably will), acknowledge and move on. Don't beat yourself up, and don't justify. Just accept that it happened and go at it again.iv.) Get help: it might be a thing (ie. app, book, device) or person (coach, financial planner, accountability friend), but you stand a greater chance of success if you don't go at it alone.Self control & discipline will never be easy, but will always be necessary. We all need it to live the kind of lives God wants us to live. So with that said, happy slugging family! We're in this together!Until next week, #KnowItsRealI just released some new music, so see below for that and more of my content I'm sure you'll be interested in.

P.S. If you're enjoying these weekly stories/lessons why not forward this email to a friend or family member.

NEW MUSIC: XXY (Remixes)

The official remix project to the original "XXY". This project features 6 remixes including 2 of the uber popular "Stay" with production from UK powerhouses, HXLY KXSS, and WYLD, and US-based Quinten Coblentz. The same songs you already know and love, re-imaginged!

YOUTUBE

Officially launched my Youtube channel. Previously I've used the label's, but it's a new day. Here you'll be able to listen to all my music and watch docs, behind-the-scenes, etc. So do me a solid by subscribing.

MORE MUSIC: XXY (The Original)

Half a million streams and counting. Check out the original XXY project that tackles themes of love, romance, heartbreak, marriage and the like. Enjoy!

UPCOMING CONCERTS

Catch me in your city. Click the photo

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